Old posts....

I ♥ Charlie Kelly!!! Fair City AGAIN

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 Wednesday, 16 September 2009 at 22:18 | Edit note | Delete

Its been a full year since i have had the pleasure of hearing Charlie - I didn't even REALISE how much I missed him!
SUCH a schizo voice on him! One minute he's PURE Dublin, Ronnie Drew stylee. Next he's completely posh! Charlie: Howayez Bela, huw do you DOOO? About 7 different personalities in each sentance!(Yeah I'm aware that that does not come across that well when written.....)

And I'm actually starting to get REALLY pissed off with the obsession with Helen Doyle. Its going on for WEEKS now! The woman is dead 13 or so years, and had rarely been spoken of since if EVER, yet she is involved in some way or another in SO MANY storylines - she's even had her picture shown and a heartwarming essay written about her. I mean what the FUCK is going on? I'm still hoping for her to come back from the dead but I very much doubt Fair City would have the balls to bring out something like that.

It's always fun to see approaching plots, cause they are usually about as subtle as Bela's bulge.
Things I am predicting are:

Something MASSIVE with Helen Doyle - either that or they just stop talking about her untill its a convenient plot linker again
More sexitime / the truth coming out about Paul and Yvonne
Mags dying
Bela being sexy
Carol becoming some sort of politician/public speaker - that parade was setting her up for something - they were hamming up her being hilarious WAAAAY too much
Zumo and that inspector Deegan getting carnal
Rita pissin her pants up in the nursing home
Yvonne being MORE crazy - maybe even getting the kid back - I honestly could NOT give a flying fuck about this one anymore - oh she's a dyke, no she's not a dyke. She's a coke head, she's not a coke head. What the fuck ever - give her AIDS and be done with it......

This is in fact a real life pic - the people in the G hotel were REAL pissed off about that TV......

Old posts....

BLEUGH Carol and Christy
I have seen many bad and terrible things on TV but very few have disturbed me, or shaken me to my core as much as the sight of aging Lothario Christy lounging on the couch in a state of post coital undress. Made worse by Carol's referral to shop counter shenanigans. eugh. I will forever have THAT mental image in my subconscious - so cheers for that Fair City.

Although I am SOOO glad that the writers decided that the time was right for Christy and Carol to finally get it on, as it was DRIVING ME MAD. It just went on and on and on and on... They will they won't - oh wait She's with Farrel, they will they won't..... Well they did, it was gross, its over. PLEASE do not drag this out anymore. 

Another storyline which will not die is this whole Doyle thing. The sheer amount of references to the past hurts my head. Helen is dead a decade at this stage. Was probably not spoken about 2 episodes after her death. Now she's the talk of the town. Makes me wonder whats going on there? Is she going to make a Dirty Den style appearance - cause I swear that would fucking ROCK. While your at it bring back a few other people - like Harry Molloy - that would be pretty cool. He'd leather lemonjaws Delores for all the bible bashing and near priest riding she's been at since his demise.

I am REALLY enjoying the superhero V supervillain way Yvonne and Suzanne talk to each other.
They're like rejects from an action movie. One day I swear Yvonne will revert to the stereotypical Bond bad guy - she'll shave her head and slowly revolve in her seat to meet Suzanne, as a newly shaved Louie sits in her lap. Or even worse..... a freshly shaved Bela!

Oh and I felt as though I should share thsi lovely sexitime shot of Cass giving Malachy a lapdance.
Look at the backround to see a VERY jealous Delores! - Don't mess with her man Cass!

Old posts....

So the news in Carrigstown is:

Carol is still slutty - a poorer slut but still a slut, in her own words "A gold diggin slapper". She is being persued by Dave Grohl's creepy, slimey, posh, Dublin twin. I say get in there love - with a snatch as invested as yours take what ya can. At least this sham has money!

Rita is still pissin her pants up in the nursing home. Alas, poor Bela is running outta money to keep her in nappies and sexy PJ's. But bless the lovely Louis - he gave Yvonne money to give to Bella for old pissy pants. This still hasn't wiped the lemon jaws off Bela, however. I rathered him a LOT more back in the day before they chopped off his knob, back when he was whoring around and impregnating the villagers. Those were good days
Oh and update on Yvonne and her child - She didn't in fact give her kid up for adoption - the child was taken off her while she was off her face on drugs. (A likely story. I think that the child was REALLY taken off her in order to get extensive plastic surgery on its mouth. Passing on THOSE genes is TOTAL neglect)
Also, is there ANY reason why Yvonne and Louie are together? Other than they are both ex-coke heads?
They CLEARLY dispise each other. Never once have they had as much as a civilised conversation, never mind show any inclination as to why they are in a relationship. Today there she was pouring her heart out about trying to kill herself over the coke, and could he be bothered? Not a fucking bit. 
Yvonne: About 7 years ago I tried to kill myself
Louis: Tough
Seriously? That's all she gets? I'd at LEAST give her a reassuring pat on the head or SOMETHING, and I can't stand the anus mouth'd whore!

Oh and EW! Delores and Malachy! What they FUCK. Piss off back to the priesthood ya Fester Adams reject. And you, missy! You should REALLY still be in mourning. Yes I know life goes on - but SERIOUSLY life kinda shat all over you for a bit. Control yourself ya whore. First it was an affair with circus performer Frank resulting in (now dead) Jessica. THEN Father Thaddeus. Now Fester Adams. Someone needs to start her HRT pretty quickly! That scene the other night with him trying to kiss her neck - oh fuck ME! It was gross! Her with her greasy red hair and him with his slimey bald head. Please, fuck off with the nasty shenanigens!

Carol being seduced by Dave Grohl's slimey lookalike.
Flowers are from Carol TO him (He's still not used to the hum of unwashed knack)

Old posts....

Ok so its been a FULL year since I have watched Fair City and I was SO excited to get into it again. What with its well written scripts and award winning acting.

So what have I missed? 
Gina was killed on her wedding day. By Barry. While travelling in a fucking sidecar. I forgot to mention that her wedding was a double wedding with her daughter and that this all happened in the church grounds. Of course...
Anyway, no one seems that bothered that she's dead to be honest. There seemed to be some sort of angst at first when Barry's courtcase was up. All that "I hate you Barry you killed my over bleached cleavage luving mother!!!!" seems to have dissapeared, now Niamh couldn't be chirpier, even though UP to this she was a pissy little bitch, bereavement seems to suit her. 

Yvonne is back. Now correct me if I'm wrong but the last time I heard this lil coke head was jujjin off in Australia (with the rest of the Doyle gang) cause she had something to do with the murder of someone, and could NEVER come back... EVER. Oh and she was up the duff.
Reports came back intermittently of her being a great and loving mother. 
Now she's back, sans child.
Seemingly she put the child up for adoption - even though it was 2 fucking years old! I understand there is a recession on and everthing and good child actors are hard to come by (like that lil BEAUT Owen) - but they could have shelled out for a fecking My Baby all Gone or something, fuck, I'll buy them a Cabbage Patch Doll and they can have a beautiful heartfelt reunion. Also someone REALLY needs to tell her that her boyfriend is a right fecking fairy.

I miss Fiona of the small mouth. Her and fat arse lips Pierce. They rocked

Will you LAMP the "sexy" lads pic. Sexy boyband eh?
I particularly love how Christy exudes confidence and charisma with the over the shoulder raincoat look. Yum

And dude on the far left, WHAT trout pout!

Old posts....

So Flyod is finally dead - and it was kinda sad watchin Renee looking at her dead son - untill she started petting him like he was a stuffed animal, kinda like a special kid petting a dog to hard. And you could almost SEE Christy's hard on poking Renee in the back as they looked on - ah it might be a sad situation but he might as well try it on again.

Oh and check out the alter Renee and Christie have to him in the house - they must have REALLY liked that actor cause its all his press pictures in the back - possibly some sort of weird wikian sex practice later 

And Brendan even helped him in his hour of need - by giving him a lethal injection. Heather wasn't there so he promised her that he held Flyod just has she would have done - I really hope not cause the thought of Brendan and Flyod doing the naked big man conga line is a tad creepy, never mind disgusting! 

Elsewhere Robins still annoying my shite and lip smacking away - surely there is SOMEONE around to tell her to SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. Seriosuly! Smack smack smack thats all the cunt does if she was anywhere near me I'd just plain headbutt the cunt. Then kick her in the fanny.

Old posts....

So poor Flyod is so riddled with cancer that he's too ill to shag his sister!! Now that IS sad. I know that it was covered LAST time they brought up the storyline - but you'd SWEAR at least ONE of them would MENTION that Flyod and Heather are brother and fucking sister!!! I just hope she doesn't get pregnant with his three armed, webfooted retarded child - one of them is enough! (aka Elenor)

I did have a good chuckle at his attempt to eat his dinner though!! Him handicappidly stabbing at the plate with his fork - which he was barely able to hold was funny enough - but when he took out his fucking phone and started txtn with the same hand had me falling on the fucking floor laughing - good old Fair City at it again - who cares about mere reality!!! 

What the FUCK has happened to Chaz's lil ginger grandsons hair???!!!  
Ah well the demon child of Ronald McDonald and Billy Ray Cyrus had to get a job somewhere. 
I also don't appreciate how they seem to be hinting at a romantic storyline with him and Rachel (Sexy Bella's GRANdaughter) THERE FUCKING 2 years old!! The least you could do is wait till the is a bit of grass on the pitch people! Yuk!! And she is one mother fuckin annoyin Stage school kid grr

And Magg's voice!!! Ha ha ha There really are no words!! I'm guessing its jaw stress form years of giving Chaz blowjobs - I may be wrong. 
Helth tho teh They! (Hello Tj)
Flanthsey a blowththob Tharley? (Would you like some oral stimulation my sexy luv bug Charley?)
Thergey haths a mattif cock! (Sergei has a massive cock!)

And a mention for the hilarious inuendo from Ray and Keete - Keete wanted to say that while he did strip for Sarah (WTF??!!!! Yuk yuk yuk YUK) he did not in fact ride her as Ray presumes

"I stripped that car I didn't give it a full service"!!!

That tramp can barely "service" himself never mind another person!! 

And now him and Una are gonna get married. Now just to find that Joe Dolan impersonator and that man who transforms Hiaces into MAGICAL carraiges!

Old posts....

This is great I just puked - watching Robin and Paul flirtin.I thought him and lispy Fiona were bad - but this is DISGUSTING. Its disgusting to them too they have to get each other paralatic to even comtemplate getting up on each other - Robin more than Paul to be fair cause not only does she have to watch Paul in the throws of passion but she has to see her uglyness reflected on his waxed head.

And the chat up lines - MY GOOD GOD - 

Robin - are you trying to get me drunk?
Paul - Would I do that?
Robin - If you were trying to seduce me you would

Now come ON Paul couldn?t seduce a ghonorheah riddled prostitute on crack if she was passed out and naked

Old posts....

Remember when Renee used to be married to Christy and live in the shop? And she had beautiful grey hair? Well that place must be like a time warp for her cause her jujji new blonde hair is gone and replaced by they grey - fucking freaky. By the way Renee cleaning the house will not stop Flyods knob rot! AND DO YOUR ROOTS! 

How are they trying to start a romantic storyline between Flyod and the sister again? Hes dying -and dying of cancer of the part that would be very important in any sexy time! Romantic day out on the Dart for them - he?s a narky little fucker - yeah I know he has cancer but if he?s gonna jujj round trying to get the hole off the sister he should make SOME effort! I also love how his penis cancer is making him cough????

Their shite talk is hilarious - Oh Flyod be with me now! Here! In this moment! (I would be outraged about her insisting they have sex on the DART but I?m sure not the first - manys the Anto and Deco were conceived on those tracks!)Its like a sit American sitcom! Only he people are uglier, and talk like there eating shite, and all have knob rot. 

I love Alley and Robin - there fucking hilarious, Ally and her skanger head and Robin and her fake Im posh I am head. 
And what a fugly little downsy basturd that lil Lorkan is!! Ahh - scared the shit outta me!! I swear to fuck if those two don?t get real jibes for each other I?ll scream - what are they doing now only going into busines together!! What the Fuck? Yeah you rode my husband and then when ye were together I rode him back - fancy buying a business together? BUT OF COURSE! - Like Alley would say but of course what she actually says is more of a grunt - yae! I weill! Even doh I hate yae!

Where did Cleo?s 14 year old male skanger voice come outta? And wheres her massive quiff gone? RIP quiff! You will be missed about as much as Delores misses her hole dead family - which is not fucking much!

Can NOT wait for tomorrow and Paul trying to ?seduce? Robin - like that one needs seducing - once Jimmy left she couldn?t get her nickers off and her legs round that egg Paul?s head quick enough!

Warning for men - DO NOT enter Carrigstown - you will get knob rot

Old posts....

Looks as though Dominic and Tracey and Mike and Geraldine are gonna start there own "keys in the bowl group". Oh yeah there fighting now - but you wait and see its will be all swinging from now on - really hope poor francis doesn't come back during that, don't thik her poor nun head could take it!

Flyod's still being ravaged by knob rot, the poor fecker, and fuck as he taken against Bob, maybe if you had decided to come back once in the 5 years you may have had time to luv him!

Oh and the jibes Robin and Ally have for each other are RAAAAWWWW

Robin: Ah, Ally, I was gonna order Champagne but didn't think that it would be very good quality - Oh and I oredered crisps (Ordered them? You fucking idiot)

Ally: Oh crips? 19 packets was it?


OOOOOOOHHHHHHHH BAD JIBES!

Fecking idiots - a 5 year old could write better - how about Robin your a mental cunt with a pube head and a face like a donkeys hole. Or Ally you have the mannerism of a scanger with an itchy hole and a face like the Bell Doyles rotted penis stump - far better



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Poor Flyod has ball cancer (They'd really need to open a medical book on that programme - first Bella, then Ray thought he had it then Mr Piggott died from it - there musn't be one proper knob jujjin round Carrigstown!(except Robin of course)) And he's decided to jujj home and be all shoced that his parents are slightly worried about his decaying cock, superman there is resistant to Chemo - his doctors even said and I quote - Woah! - Very technical exclamation meaning Flyod is a lying basturd who is prob perfectly healthy

And Robin has gone from annoying to FUCKING HORRENDOUSLY ANNOYING!!! Fuck sake did someone get her Mean Girls the dvd for XMass cause she's got all silly tit American these days - all smug looks and "cutting" remarks - fucking idiot, I wish they would just kill her off

Old posts....

Poor Eunis is finally dead, and about time too, images if Hughy jujjin round with a dead body in the Bahamas was creepy in a The Butcher Boy meets Weekend at Bernie's kinda way, fucking creepy, him applyin her really pink lipstick morning after morning - then puttin some on her!

The mess that is Robin is still jujjin around, she's managed to woo the sexxy sexxy egg shaped head eligable bachelor Paul, now to be fair its been a while since poor Paul got any, not since Mrs Piggot left - oh the glory days! Lispy luvvin and constipated glances!

Poor Francis found out that her fience used to ride prozzies - well he was HARDLY riding normal people with THAT head on him, and come on now Francis, beggars can't be choosers, your options are pretty much him or back to the nuns (sluurp sluurp)! And NOT ONLY that! BUT HER OWN SISTER used to flaunt her vagina to the nearest buyer!!!

Elsewhere : 
Bob has a horrible growth coming from his eye, and can't buy the pub (Boo Hoo ya fucking faggot sickener, like I'd take a pint from your slimy hands, maybe if you could even say your wives name properly)

Old posts....

This is so sad this will prob be one of the last of these for a year! Korean TV just won't live up to Fair City!!

Anyway! For some reason Lana is back on the minds of the Carrigstown peeps again - thought they would have just let that one GO!! Sergei is ADAMANT that he will find her - claiming she would never turn her back on him so why would he turn his back on her? (The reason why she would never turn her back on him was because she was afraid of getting 12 inches of Hot Russian sausage in her arse! Not because she would want to find him!) I also realised why Mags has such a bad speech impediment! Its cause all that 12 inches of Hot Russian sausage is CONSTANTLY in her mouth! So much so that she can't talk! Silly old whore, mad for the Cock Mags!

I LOVED the fight between Robin, Jimmy, Allie and Carol in McCoys!!! Fucking hilarious, Carol turns into a fire breathing tinker and Allie just stands there pretending to cry and trying to see out from underneath that shite fringe! But the best is Robin, she's FUCKING hilarious although EXTREMELY annoying, between her lip smacking and beret wearing I don't know wether to smack her of just all out drown the cunt - with the beret!!

Oh and Ive not said it in a while - Keeths girlfriend is a tramp

PS WHY THE FUCK are RTE employing Fiona of the small mouth and constipated lust faces to do voice overs on all their adds? SHE CAN NOT SPEAK!

Old posts....

Well the life of poor Jimmy Doyle is getting pretty mental! He found out a while ago that his luv juice has no baby makers so he found himself the nearest trampy mother and got up on her, they made beautiful love for a while until Robin decided (as we all did) that it was time she topped herself and fuck off, but alas! Robin can?t even manage to fucking do that and so he rode her in pity. She?s now realised that her life isn?t that sad so she?s popped on a beret and hit the town (i.e. McCoy?s) roaring in her best Sasha?s voice while poor strokey Rita lays slumped at home in the wheelchair, only manovering enough to piddle herself.

Elsewhere Bella is getting to obvious about his secret dirty times with Sergei ? he keeps calling him Sir Gay ? his secret sexytime name for him. Leo still can?t find the wife, so he found someone elses, and is now having second thoughts, obviously a sexpot like him could find something better? Its like he ACTUALLY thinks he?s Elvis!!! 

The Leaving Cert is approaching and obviously another stressed student story line is happening so that politicians daughter is all drugged up and studying to be an architect, as is Malachy?s step daughter ? this one recons she?s s doctor, fucking kip! Anyway there all stressing and being hcaps and ESPECIALLY the politicians daughter who looks about 50 odd and keeps pulling manky funny faces. And I really love how she only met her Dad five mins ago (remember her Barry?s Tea Granny who died?), and he?s managed to forget about his other son (who she tried ridin - the daughter, not her Barry's Tea Granny) and pushed all hopes and dreams on her. Seriously fuck off you don?t know the girl! You only met her last week how about you do what a proper life long absentee father does and just buy the poor girl shit ya weirdo! 


Heather found out that her sexy hubby Brendan sired another child ? who was subsequently given to Dermot and Jo for GOD KNOWS what reason, and she has, quite rightly, kicked his cheating doctory arse out, but Bob, her kinda step father has decided for her that its PERFECTLY ok to jujj around riding mental cases and impregnating them and has told Heather that she?s a cunt for being mad, Brendan ALSO thinks this, so what does she do? becomes friends with a random person in McCoy?s ? Robin, that?s all we need are two mental lunatics teaming up and jujjing around hating their husbands, or maybe there setting up some hot lesbo action (Not so much hot as file and disgusting ? not that Im against Lesbians, Im just against the idea of ANYTHIN that ugly teaming up for sexy time)

Things to watch out for when watching Fair City
1. Robin before she says EVERY sentance - *sluuurp* How are you? *sluuurp* I still love Jimmy
2. Bella?s Sexy limp
3. The tres funny bad acting of Timmi Rita ? actually everyone bad actin, its hilarious
4. The fact the Eunis is ?still alive? and jujjin in Bolivia with Hughey - in real life she is WELL dead
5. Bella?s complete angriness at the world around him
6. Rita?s pj?s

Old posts....

Loving Fair City these days and the fact that holy joe Delores is about to have a big holly shaggathon with father THADDEAUS!! Those watching will notice all the sexy intense stares they give each other, and the sexy sexy priest is now visiting Delores EVERY DAY. My fav moment with these starcrossed lovers is when the sexpot in a collar Thaddeaus asked the sexy housewiddow Delores to join him in a bitta choir singing, and shte had to bite her knuckle in totally lust and WONTENNESS!! That slaaag! 

Poor Rita has had a stroke, don't worry though Susanne is on the case for stroke victoms EVERYWHERE - Poor Rita has noting to do these days but drool off the side of the bed while the sexy sexy Bella frets for her life! It has in fact made Rita a far better actress!

Bon the scroundel is back to old tricks with a new tax scandel! He'd better be careful hotties like Renee do not stay round for long!! 

Old posts....

Ok, well that tramp una and her trooomp elvis wannabe ex Keeeth (Makes me think Molloy's garage HAS to have Elvis working there - think Harry) are having a baby - but not just any old baby - a big handicapped one!!! So now you know what happens when 2 tramps procreate! And in the middle of all this is Ginger red nyuck Nicola who is basically following Keeth around humping his leg as he goes "do you mind I have a tramp and a timme baby to attend to" (he obviously doesn't say attend)

Peirce is becomming an even bigger weirdo, and his mouth is still making me puke on my dinner when I say it, now he thinks that writer one who was on the Avonmore milk add before (the one where she wins a three lagged race or something) is stealing his ideas - ya the published novelist is stealing ideas from a homeless barman who wears lipstick and rides aids infested tramps? Totally

OH I NEARLY FORGOT LANA'S MISSING -cause I don't care, we all could SEE she was pregnant, so this oh she's dead thing is quite shit, and they better kill her off cause Leo is about to jump into the river in Bray, Big ginger head on him should have known better than to buy a Russian bride! She obviously woke up that morning, looked over and saw Shrek and ran away to be with Sergei and be Russian again - fucking Irish taxi driver you are not lady. She's way to pretty for him anyway, the big gobshite

Old posts....

Well, what a time its been in lives of the habitants of Carrigstown!
Firstly - Fiona of the small mouth has fucked off to someplace in Europe- minus the lovely James money! How will this affecd Paul you ask? Well he's very distressed, as we can see by his day old bum fluff, and of course as a distressed man he couldnt POSSIBLY wear a suit! No its a suitable filty jacket for him!

Romance is blossoming for the psycho Pierce (kjnown from here on out as fat arse lips), who is kinda obsessed with doing a bit of writing, recons he's Shakespear that one! And I really love how the writers of the great soap get it across that people are well sickened with him, they say it quite loudly and beside him, but its ok his back is turned.

Anyway he's mad to ride Heather, leaving his REALLY REALLY trampy massivly quiffed girlfriend well pissed off.
And Keith has finally finished with his tramp girlfriend, about a week after they decided to "build" her character and ,ake her a hairdresser (sorry about this mum, but could you get a trampier profession? Fitting much!)

Elsewhere crooked jaws Suzanne wants to shag Damian, but he's riding that teacher one who's pure weird, her ex boyfriend is even weirdo, I know that FC doesn't usually have the best callibre of actin but with these two there definatly trying to get their quota of timmi's for legal reasons.
him: I want you back...... (cant remember her name)
her: Ahhh, No, good...bye.I.love.damian

Old posts....

This piggot shit gets batter and better, FIONA KILLED JAMES! Yeah, wow, the cats arse lipped woman we all know and love is now not only and aldutere, but a MURDERING SKANK! wow, and she's done him outta milllions too, fucking disgrace full behaviour. Not only that but she was never even married to him in the first place, the coniving lil minx hadnt divorced sexy barge owner and dube smoker ex husband whatever his name is. wonder what will happen there. Damian's girlfriend with the greasy hair and hairband luvvin is pissed that he used to ride Susanne, like seriously, they were the only two people near that age for a while in Carrigstown, who were they meant to ride instead? Mags and Charlie? I'd give that Chaz one though - a slap! Then I would inform him that his oap wife was ridin the lovely Sergei, love how they just ended there little owuld be affair as if nothing had ever happened! We all felt that sexual tension, it was unmistakable, electric eve.
And Keiths girlfriend is a tramp
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Oh my god Fair City is AMAZING! It turns out that the scruffy dude Fiona is being blackmailed by (she's giving him JEWLEREY, the woman has like 2 million in a company her husband does'nt know about and she hocks his dead wifes jewelery - bitch) is her EX HUSBAND! DUH DUH DUUUUHHH, amazing stuff
Fair City also showed us the evils of smoking the dube las night with there true to life depiction of two middleaged men on a fucking barge getting stoned - WARNING to everybody, if you smoke the dube you will end up livin on a barge with long hair and bad teeth, you heard it there first.
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Tragedy in Fair City! Old Mr Piggot is dying a cancer! Its gone sll the way from his lovely throbbing (for Fiona) Penis to his beautiful pancreas. Faced wioth the prospect of a dead husband Fiona is trying to climb back up on Paul again - now it might seem a bit in bad taste, but she's ugly, doesn't know she's up the pole and is Paul doesn;t tide her no one will - stay tuned for more sexual-constipated looks.
Gina had to piss off to England cause her slutty preggers at 5 daughter has fuckin PLURASY! Like could the gorl have gotten in a car crash? Got pneumonia? fell in a hole? no she had to get a fucking boggery old man disease! fucking legend writers

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Little dude who's parents died tragically (also known as on the the FUNNIEST ever storylines) realises he's as thick as shit, and has to get grinds so he can be as intelligent as his soon to be gay lover and fellow "fight club" founder. Paul fucks Fiona of the small mouth and speech impediment in his flat and when their not fucking their giving each other a look which is either ive seen you naked or im dying for a shit - Im sure no one really cares which it is cause their both mingers. Robin and Jimmy fiddle with cars while Ray and Keith pretend their not in love with each other, while Ray dreams of one day fondoling Keiths David Beckham earring, and Keiths girlfriend is a tramp.

Well, scaldy eyes rape lover Kylie is GOING BACK TO COUNCELLING! Yippee, life is well again, can't wait till her father starts beaatin her and Tracey round the house! Ha ha Fair City + Domestic Violence = Laugh Out Loud comedy! Deirdre is p the duf dun dun dun! Not that anyone wants to see what kinda child Ken's spunk could conjour up - look at Owen - ewwwwww child gives me the creeps! And where he get that scanger accent outta? PAH-LEA-AZZZ give me tha da. Poor Christies heart is broken again my Bob an Rennay, why cant Bb say Rene's name properly, fucking knob head. Update on Paul fucking Fiona of the small mouth: Lushly lispy Fiona's husband caught willy cancer off Ray! Fucking hell what were they at? And now Paul has to find another small mouth to shag and to give constipated looks to. Lil Lorkan was christened, much to the disaproval of lemon jaws Robin, oh no you didn Jimmy! Adn Keith and his girldfriend are on holiday, and Keiths girlfriend is a tramp